Tuesday, April 19, 2011


I've never been very good at journaling. I always feel silly while I'm writing, and then later when I go back and read it I feel even sillier and sometimes even end up ripping pages out and tearing them into tiny pieces. It's that bad. I don't know, I just can't get the right tone down, I guess. I never feel like I sound like myself.

I think my best-chronicled years were my mission years. It was still spotty, and I did better with some companions than others (thanks, Heidi!), but I managed to fill a few composition books, a loose leaf binder, and of course my daily planners. Maybe it was easier then because it felt like there was always something to write about - meeting people, sharing the gospel, disappointments, joys, hilarious moments, really embarrassing ones, and of course extremely spiritual times.

And, you know, times when I got soaked.

The thing is, I feel like this time in my life is also a very spiritual, very precious time. I feel like I have extra responsibility to record these years because my children won't remember them. Isaac is not going to remember a single thing of what happens to him - it'll probably be a year or two more before his first memories kick in. So I feel like I am the keeper of these precious years. And I am not doing a very good job.

Sometimes I feel like I just need to find the right journal. Maybe one with journaling prompts included to help me on days when I'm feeling blank? (Sorry you're feeling so blank inside... anyone? Brian Regan fans?) I really love these printable journaling pages from Grace is Overrated, but after printing several of them out, I realized they weren't really helping me write about my life now. I want someone to create the Mom version, but as of yet, no one has.

So, I finally made myself a journal. It's not the mother of all journals I'd like it to be, but it's a journal and it's cute. I've been wanting to make one for a while, had the perfect fabric picked out, bought my composition book during back-to-school sales for 25 cents. So, six months later, I finally got it together.

Here it is:

Here's how it looks inside.

Yeah, cute journal and everything, and I still don't write in it. I want to. Does the first blank page of a journal intimidate anyone else as much as it intimidates me?

Any suggestions?

Really do love that fabric, though.


Shirley said...

Our blog is our family journal. I feel like if I didn't have that, I wouldn't write. But I do like writing in journals, I have just been horrible with it since we got married.

Your journal looks really cute! You could do what my mom did with me when I was little and write it as you are Isaac. Like "I did this today and mommy and daddy are really proud of me!" That way you get memories for him. And if you feel so inclined to write more, just make another cute journal for your personal experiences. :)

Kristal said...

You are so neat. I'm glad I have you around to inspire me!

Christian and Jennifer said...

So cute! I am the same way with journals . . . and if you look at several of the journals I have, you would find lots and lots of pages ripped out. Especially at the beginning! I always have a hard time starting a journal the way I want to. And my journaling days ended approximately 10 months into my mission, which ended over 10 years ago. I'm a lame, lame slacker.


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